Mr. Burns

Lore & Background

Born on Pangea, Burns emerged from a wealthy family of eleven children as the sole survivor after his siblings met suspicious ends involving poisoned baked potatoes. He attended Yale University in 1914, joining Skull and Bones and competing in "etherweight" wrestling before leaving to live with a heartless billionaire grandfather who owned an "atom mill." His military service included time in the Flying Hellfish squad under Master Sergeant Abraham Simpson during the Battle of the Bulge, where they secured a stolen German portrait. Later, he served as a co-pilot with Abe and his brother Cyrus in the Pacific Theater before being shot down by a kamikaze. In a twist of historical absurdity, Burns was personally hired by President Harry S. Truman to transport a trillion-dollar bill for European reconstruction, only to abscond with it until losing it to Fidel Castro. His personal life includes three failed engagements—to Gertrude (who died of rabies), Marge's mother Jacqueline Bouvier, and meter maid Gloria—as well as a brief relationship with Larry Burns, his adopted son.

In Their Own Story

In his office at the nuclear plant, Burns monitors workers via closed-circuit cameras, often failing to recognize Homer Simpson despite their frequent interactions. His trademark expression involves muttering "Excellent..." in a low, sinister voice while steepling his fingertips, a phrase he uses when ordering Smithers to "release the hounds" to attack intruders or even invited guests. During the episode "Homer at the Bat," he attempted to recruit dead-ball-era players like Honus Wagner and Cap Anson for the plant's softball team, only to be informed they had died long ago. His greed once led him to block out the sun with a satellite dish to force residents to use his electricity, an act that ended with him being shot by baby Maggie while attempting to steal candy. In "The Trouble with Trillions," his possession of the stolen trillion-dollar bill became central to the plot, highlighting his ability to manipulate financial systems for decades.

Reader's Guide

To navigate the world of Mr. Burns, one must understand his reliance on outdated conventions and his complete detachment from modern reality. He answers phones with "Ahoy-hoy," a salutation proposed by Alexander Graham Bell, and his investment portfolio includes defunct entities like "Confederated Slave Holdings." His age is fluid; while he claimed to be 81 in one episode, another established that half his age is 78, making him 156. He frequently references the Siege of Khartoum (1884) and believes a nickel buys a steak, pie, coffee, cheesecake, newsreel, and trolley ride. His residence, Burns Manor, sits on Mammon and Croesus Streets, protected by electrified fences and vicious dogs known as "The Hounds." Despite his villainous status—ranked #2 by TV Guide and #8 by Rolling Stone—he remains a complex figure whose longevity is both a source of humor and a barrier to human connection.

Did You Know?

• Mr. Burns was born on the supercontinent Pangea, revealed in the Season 17 episode "The Seemingly Never-Ending Story".
• His current net worth has been cited as $1.3 billion by Forbes, though it fluctuates wildly depending on the episode.
• Burns once served as a co-pilot with Abraham Simpson and his brother Cyrus before being shot down by a kamikaze in the Pacific Theater.
• He was hired personally by President Harry S. Truman to transport a trillion-dollar bill, which he kept for many years before losing it to Fidel Castro.
• His mother is still alive at age 122 and refers to him as an "improvident lackwit" due to her affair with President William Howard Taft.